It's my old house. Here I am a girl. It seems stuck in time. The carpet is the same. The kitchen too. Papa has a new chair. But most looks the same. The tree is outside. It's just taller I think of the past. Bad memories. I was in trouble. Stealing from the store. Fighting with my mom. I didn't have good things. No money. Mom didn't work. Papa just worked.
It's dinner. The family is there. My Mom comes. Also Papa. Nana comes to. And her husband. We sit at the table. Nana is good. She asks me. How am I? I tell her good. I tell her in Calgary. Soon I will go to school. She tells me I look healthy. I look good. I've grown so much. She is older. Her hair is grey now. But she has energy. She asks what is my future. I tell her not sure. I will take school. In September I will go I say. I really don't know.
Mom doesn't say much. She tells me I look good. She sais no problems now. I don't like it. Always to remind me. I tell her I have a boyfriend. She is curious. Who? I tell her Mark. Papa speaks. He met me. He said he's a nice guy. My Mom sais he must come over. She must meet him. I tell her maybe. He is here just 4 days. You see. She not see me for 11 years. But must know all my life. Just wishes to see I failed. I get this text. It's Marky. He asks me. Do I have time tomorrow? I say when. He sais morning. It's a surprise. I say OK. He wants my address. I freeze. He will come here? I tell him he comes here? He says just to get me. We are going some place. I tell Papa tomorrow in the morning. I must get up early. He sais how come. I say Mark has a surprise. He sais ok. To wake at 8.
I lie in bed. It's like I am 14. This house feels angry. I imagine. The walls look at me. With teeth. As a little girl I see them. Now I am a woman. I see them still. It's warm. I open the window. I can hear the trees. They whisper in the wind. I don't like it here. I wish to leave. I wish to go see Mark. I can't. I will upset Papa. For him it's a big deal. For me, it's prison here. My Mom is no different. At dinner it's drinks. Out of the little glass. She gets drunk. Voice slurs. She calls Papa down. Nothing is different.
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