Christmas

Soon it's Christmas.  I have no money.  I wish to get Papa a gift.  Also I get Marky a gift.  He is good to me.  I have no money.  I can't count bottles each day.  No work.  Unhappily Married mails me. He asks for a session.  He mails only for this.  I tell him no more.  He sais ok. A week passes, mails again.   So I think it's money.  I can do it.  I agree.  I tell him 3 browns.  He wants 2 sessions.  I do it.

Now is different. Not the same like before.  We meet for the session. My apartment.  He is bigger now.  Stressed.  I shower him.  He is surprised.  I tell him condom.  No BB.  He asks why.  I sais to him no.  I say no. It's no.  Got it buddy?  You a client now.  He tells me he has a new whore now.  I think its why the condom.  We have one more session.  It's over.  He leaves.  I watch him go. His car leaves. 

It's the last time I am a whore.  It's no more.  This life is ended for me.  No matter how hard it is not again.  I clean myself up.  Now I have some money.  I will get some gifts.  For Papa, it's a card to get tools.  He likes it.  For Georgia I will get her some food & pay her bill.  And for Marky, I think.  I will come up with an idea. 

It's a good day.  To walk.  It's cool now.  The air is crisp . Sun shines.  It shines on me now too.  Life is tough.  I am poor.It's a struggle.  But I am a butterfly.  I am free.  I land on the flower.  I walk in the street.  Larissa smiles first time.  My heart is light.  I say it before I quit.  This time it's for sure.  It's 11 years as a whore.  What is this like?  For me.  Drugs.  Addiction.  Empty.  Sad.  Angry.  Vindictive.  Hate.  Rage.  Rich.  Control.  You see good words?  I don't see many.  Rich?  Maybe?  I tell you rich.  Rich is happy.  Rich is a good boyfriend.  Rich is a baby in the grass at a picnic.  This is rich. 

Christmas is soon.  I know what I give to Mark.  I give him me.